A Nigerian event is not just an event; it’s a full-blown experience. From the moment the invitation drops to the last person dancing at the afterparty, you’re in for a journey. Whether it’s a wedding, birthday, or even a naming ceremony, here’s a play-by-play of the chaos, culture, and colour that define every Nigerian event.
1. The Anticipated Invitation
Forget formal RSVPs, your first alert is often a broadcast message on WhatsApp:
“You’re specially invited to the wedding of the year. “Even better? A digital invite flyer with 3 outfit themes, 2 locations, and 1 “strictly by invitation” line that nobody follows. The real event invite? It’s the Asoebi; once you pay for fabric, you’re automatically enlisted in the bridal army.
2. Asoebi Selection & Tailor Tension
The Asoebi coordinator sends you a sample fabric with the caption: “₦45k only, it comes with gele!” You pay. Now begins the tailor battle: Will your outfit be ready in time? Will it fit? Will your tailor travel mysteriously a week before the event? Prayers intensify as you prepare backup options.
3. Prepping for the Big Day
Makeup artist: Booked, Outfit: Pressed and waiting. Shoes: Painful, but beautiful. Your camera-ready face starts at 6 AM for an event that starts at 2 PM. Meanwhile, logistics drama begins: car pooling, traffic concerns, and searching for Google Maps fails.
4. Arrival & Fashion Parade
You finally arrive, late (as expected), but fashionably so. Guests are lined up like it’s a runway. Head-turning gele, blinding sequins, and men in agbadas larger than life. First mission at the event; look for the photographer and get your 30-photo shoot in before sweat and small chops ruin the look.
5. The Main Ceremony (a.k.a Waiting Game)
The MC starts hyping. “The bride is coming soon.” 45 minutes later, she’s still coming. Everyone’s seated, trying not to look hungry. The DJ is dropping bangers, but the Jollof is still backstage. Meanwhile, the aunties at the event are side-eyeing outfits and whispering updates to the family WhatsApp group.
6. Feeding Frenzy
When food finally arrives, the energy shifts. Small chops disappear in seconds. People suddenly remember they’re lactose intolerant after eating a small puff and a cheese roll. The ones who came with takeaway coolers are already hunting down the servers with coded eyes. Jollof, fried rice, moimoi, asun, it’s war, and the fittest will feast.
7. The Dance Floor Drama
Now the MC shouts: “If you love the couple, come and spray them!” The bridal party storms in like Nollywood royalty. Uncles and friends start spraying ₦200 notes with choreography. Asoebi girls are vibing like it’s a music video. One auntie starts her solo praise break because “God must be praised.”
8. Photo Ops and Last-Minute Slay
At this point, faces are oily, the headgear (gele) has shifted at the event, but nobody leaves without a photo by the flower wall. “You didn’t attend if you don’t post.” Friends gather for group shots
9. The Silent Exodus
Slowly, people start disappearing, especially those who didn’t eat or were seated in the “no food” zone. Leftover souvenirs are grabbed, gele is removed, and slippers replace stilettos. The DJ is still playing, but the aunties have gone home with the cooler crew.
10. Afterparty Wahala
If it’s a wedding, there’s usually an official or unofficial afterparty. Some head to clubs or lounges. Others go to the hotel room with leftover drinks, Bluetooth speakers, and deep life gist. It’s where the real dancing, shoe-removal, and uncle-you-were-dancing-too-much analysis begins.
A Nigerian event is not just a ceremony, it’s a movie, a marathon, and sometimes even therapy. Whether you came for vibes, food, or content, you’ll leave with stories, possibly sore feet, and a phone full of photos you’ll never post.
